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Conversation with my coworker yesterday

HIM: Casey! I finally found a Twitter worth reading! ME: Oh really? What is it? WHAT I FIGURED HE'D SAY: @sween OR: @badbanana OR: @michaelianblack WHAT HE SAID: @shitmydadsays WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID: You. It was you all along, right there in front of me. Please let me pay you to write jokes on the internet.